Always
by MagicalSmile
Summary: A small one-shot from Snape's point of view. :) Hope you like it :)


**ALWAYS**

A teenage boy was sitting in the darkness, his face covered behind his long black hair and his hands. He was shaking. He had done the worst mistake in his whole life, and there was nothing he could do to make it better again. He shook his head and stood up, wiping the tears from his eyes. He looked around, as if checking that no one had seen him. Then he started climbing up the stairs.

The castle was big, and it took time for him to walk up to the tower. He had no idea how he was going to get her out of there, but there had got to be a way. He arrived to the portrait and started thinking. What he really needed was that she would come out from the tower, going to the Library or something else like that. But how unlikely was that? He sat down on the stone floor, thinking about his options, when he heard footsteps approaching.

"Snape? What the fuck are you doing here?" he heard a female voice ask. It was her best friend.

"I'd want to speak to Lily..." he said faintly.

"Well Lily doesn't want to talk to you," she answered rudely and turned towards the portrait hole.

"Please, Prewett, I just need to explain myself... If you can't get her here, I'll sleep here, waiting for her to leave for breakfast. She can't escape," he said slowly.

"Okay, I'll try, but I can't promise anything..." she said and whispered the password to the painting carefully so that Snape couldn't hear it.

Soon for Snape's delight a red haired witch stepped out of the portrait hole.

"What?" she asked impatiently.

"Lily, I'm sorry for what I said..."

_This Romeo is bleeding _

_But you can't see his blood _

_It's nothing but some feelings _

_That this old dog kicked up _

"YOU'RE SORRY? YOU DO REALISE YOU CALLED ME A MUDBLOOD, YOU THINK I CAN FORGIVE THAT? I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY FRIEND, MY BEST FRIEND!" she shouted.

"Lily, let me explain..."

_It's been raining since you left me _

_Now I'm drowning in the flood _

_You see I've always been a fighter _

_But without you I give up _

"You think your explanations make this any better? You call everyone else, who has my blood status, a mudblood, why should I be any different. You said what you think, and you should be happy now!"

"That's not what I think, Lils," he started.

"DON'T CALL ME LILS! WE ARE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE."

"Lily please, you are different than the others."

"I'M DIFFERENT THAN THE OTHERS? YOU THINK THE OTHERS DESERVE TO BE CALLED MUDBLOODS? THEY DON'T! THEY'RE WITCHES AND WIZARDS, JUST LIKE YOU AND ME."

"Lily, I-"

_I can't sing a love song _

_Like the way it's meant to be _

_Well, I guess I'm not that good anymore _

_But baby, that's just me _

_And I will love you, baby - Always _

_And I'll be there forever and a day - Always _

_I'll be there till the stars don't shine _

_Till the heavens burst and _

_The words don't rhyme _

_And I know when I die, you'll be on my mind _

_And I'll love you - Always _

"Sev, it's over. I never want to talk to you again," she interrupted walking back to the portrait, not looking back.

Severus felt like dying. The pain in his heart would never go away. He knew he could never stop loving her, but he also knew she would never fall for her. Why was it so easy to make mistakes? Why can't you just go back in time and cancel what you've done?

With Lily his life would have been so much better, so much happier, even in the friendzone, even though he wanted more. The years they'd had were the best he could hope for, and he knew he'd never get anything near that good.

_Now your pictures that you left behind _

_Are just memories of a different life _

_Some that made us laugh, some that made us cry _

_One that made you have to say goodbye _

_What I'd give to run my fingers through your hair _

_To touch your lips, to hold you near _

_When you say your prayers try to understand _

_I've made mistakes, I'm just a man _

When it was time to go back for summer holidays, Severus saw the worst real life nightmare he could have. Lily was there laughing with the Marauders. Apparently Potter had done something good, becoming her friend. And that wasn't all, at all. When they said their goodbyes, Lily hugged Potter, smiling. And Severus could swear he saw Potter kissing her cheek gently.

Why would she want to be with that idiot? What did Potter have that Severus didn't? Why was love so unfair? Even though it seemed like they weren't dating, Severus knew they would end up together. That was what he had feared for so long, and the fact that they were now friends made it even more probable. Life was unfair for Severus.

_When he holds you close, when he pulls you near _

_When he says the words you've been needing to hear _

_I'll wish I was him 'cause those words are mine _

_To say to you till the end of time _

_Yeah, I will love you baby - Always _

_And I'll be there forever and a day - Always _

Snape was holding her dead body in his embrace, crying. There had been so many times he had cried for her, so many things he would have loved to change, so many mistakes he had done, and the worst was the one causing her death. He glanced at the little baby boy in his crib, crying of course, and sighed. Of course he had to be just like Potter.

He stared for a while at the curious scar the boy had on his forehead and smiled. Maybe Severus could be able to stand the kid, for her. Maybe he wouldn't be as bad as his father was. His gaze moved to the boy's eyes. Green. Just like hers. And for the first time since fifth year, he smiled.

_If you told me to cry for you _

_I could _

_If you told me to die for you _

_I would _

_Take a look at my face _

_There's no price I won't pay _

_To say these words to you _

_Well, there ain't no luck _

_In these loaded dice _

_But baby if you give me just one more try _

_We can pack up our old dreams _

_And our old lives _

_We'll find a place where the sun still shines _

Severus was looking up to her eyes. Her beautiful emerald green eyes he had thought he'd never see again. Even though the rest of the face was wrong, he was happy. He was in pain, but happy, and he knew he had to make it up somehow, that he had mistreated Lily's son for all those years. He had thought he could stand him for her, but he couldn't. He was too much like his father.

And the friends of the boy made Severus's pain even worse, a redhead and a muggleborn bookworm. It felt like the karma was testing him. But now, lying there, watching to the eyes, he knew he could die in peace.

_And I will love you, baby - Always _

_And I'll be there forever and a day - Always _

_I'll be there till the stars don't shine _

_Till the heavens burst and _

_The words don't rhyme _

_And I know when I die, you'll be on my mind _

_And I'll love you - Always_


End file.
